why you should listen to your wife

Chris calls it "nagging," and I call it "helping." I'll let you decide what term is more appropriate.

Whether it's "helping" Chris to scrape his dishes before he puts them in the dishwasher, or "helping" him acknowledge the poor carhop at Sonic that brings us our 1/2 priced shakes (an embarrassing amount of  two or more times a week), I am constantly finding ways to "help" him ;)

One thing I have been "helping" him with ever since we got married is using his blinkers. Up until this past Saturday night, Chris didn't believe me when I would say, "You need to signal! People HATE people that don't signal!" But then on our way home from a movie Saturday night, Chris rolled through a right turn at an intersection + didn't signal (double whammy!). Within seconds, there were red and blue lights flashing behind us. Sh*z! 

The officer walked up to my side of the car and signaled for me to roll down the window. I'm sure I was making my this-is-completely-my-husband's-fault-please-don't-get-mad-at-me face, because he ended up being really nice. The conversation went a little something like this:

policeman: Hey, is there a reason why you didn't stop or signal at that light back there?
Chris: Ohh... I didn't signal? I could've sworn I signaled! My wife is always on me about signalling.
policeman: (laughing) Well, she's gonna need to get on you a bit more, because you didn't signal or make a complete stop. I'm going to need to see your license and registration please...

While the police officer is doing whatever police officers do in their car, Chris is going off justifying his actions. "There's way worse things going on than people not using their blinkers!" "Do they have a certain quota they need to pull people over for?!" "I really can't get another ticket after last month." etc. It was actually kind of funny. It took all the willpower I had to not burst out and say I TOLD YOU SO!

Finally the officer came back and to both of our relief, he let Chris off with a warning. Then he looked at me and said something along the lines of  "I hope he starts listening to you," to which I replied, "I know. Hopefully this helps!" Then the officer gave a little chuckle and sent us on our way.

As the policeman was walking back to his car, I couldn't help but wonder if maybe he has a wife that "helps" him too, and maybe that was the reason he let Chris off with a warning, because he knows that dealing with your wife is a whole lot worse than a policeman...

I think it's safe to say that it'll be a while before I need to "help" Chris about signaling with his blinkers.

Friendship and Fitness: Bridal Veil Falls

It's Saturday. I'm blogging. I feel like I only blog on the weekends. I can assure you though, it's not because I'm incredibly busy on weekdays. Unless you consider sitting at work and looking at pinterest all day busy?  No. Maybe I only blog on the weekends because I love putting off cleaning my house, or laying in my bed bra-less while I type stories that involve me being productive and posting pictures where I look semi-socially acceptable? That's not a maybe, that's a definitely. Anyway, enough of my excuses for not blogging very much. Onwards to my adventure with Whit today!

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Me and Whit have been going on bike rides once a year since high school. Once a year mainly because that's about how long it takes for my crotch to recover from biking. Woof. After today, I'm almost thinking it's worth investing in some padded shorts. Anyway, me and Whit decided to ride to Bridal Veil Falls. I honestly don't think I can get sick of that trail. It's so beautiful. 

On the way up to Bridal Veil everything was going fairly smoothly. We were going at a decent pace and only got passed by one group of bikers. You know, those groups of bikers that all wear the same outfit and take up the whole road when you're driving up the canyon and you kind of hate them for a minute? Yeah, we only got passed by one of those groups, which made me feel better about myself and my biking skills. 

As for on the way down the canyon.... not so smooth. First, let me just tell you that I already really struggle on bikes(hence, the reason I'm a runner). Apparently, I had forgotten that and developed new confidence in my biking abilities because I became so confident that I took one hand off my handlebars and was able to fish around in my sports bra for my phone that was sliding everywhere while zooming down the canyon. Side note: it's a sad realization when you have enough room in your sports bra for your phone to wander around and get lost. As soon as I had retrieved my phone and looked up, Whit had pulled off to the side of the trail to get a drink, so I immediately slammed on  my breaks. More specifically, my front breaks. Oops. The next thing I know, I'm flipping over the front tire and yelling out curse words while the world around me is spinning in slow motion. It's too bad that Whit wasn't looking when I crashed, because I'm sure she would have had a good laugh. Luckily, it was only my shin that really got scraped up. Seriously though, I'm lucky.

Once I washed up my cut a bit, we started biking back home again. Except my bike started sounding weird and I was still a little shaken up after experiencing what the guys in Jack Ass and Nitro Circus do. So I made Whit pull over and look at my bike, which was actually Whit's bike, that's named La Tigra--awesome right? So Whit, being the best friend that she is, got down and started working on that bike like my own personal grease monkey. I just let her do her thing while I was the designated bike holder. After a few twists and turns, Whit had fixed the chain and had La Tigra  up and goin' again and we were able to make it home without anymore spontaneous pit stops ;)

Besides the whole crashing thing, I loved our bike ride. It was so fun just getting to be outdoors and catchin' up with my best friend. The only bad part about it was that it made me that much more sad to see Whit leave for Jerusalem in a couple of weeks. Who else am I going to complain to about my sore crotch muscles and talk Gossip Girl with while stuffing my face with chili cheese fries?! Oh, Whit. You will be missed.

Friendship and Fitness: to be continued...

suffering from INSANITY

It all started last Saturday night when Chris decided to start the exercise program, Insanity, because he "felt fat" (a common feeling in the Gourley home..."marriage fifteen" is real). So he popped the DVD in and started with what's called the "fit test." What was I doing? Sitting on the couch, still trying to digest my Costa Vida from earlier.

As I watched Chris do the fit test, which entailed exercises with names like power jumps, suicide jumps, and push-up jacks, I couldn't help but critique his form a little bit--something I would soon regret. Did I mention that I made fun of him for being tired after just the warm-up? I was also kind enough to mention a couple or five times how uncoordinated he looked. Don't worry, I get what's comin' to me soon.

Since Chris was tired of getting coached by me, he made me swear that I would do the fit test the next day, and that he would get to watch me. I thought, Sure! I run and do zumba, this will probably be a piece of cake for me! I can't wait to show you that I'm in better shape than you. Then the next day came around, and I made some lame excuse as to why I wasn't going to do it. Babe, we don't exercise on Sunday! It's almost 10:00, way past our bedtime, and I ate a lot at my parents.

Since I wussed out on Sunday, I decided I would get up in the morning and do it. That way, Chris probably wouldn't watch me either. So I woke up at 6:03 in the morning, got my workout clothes on, and walked downstairs with confidence that I was going to do better on the fit test than Chris. 

I turned the DVD on feeling pumped. Switch kicks? I ain't scurred! Power jacks? Come at me, bro! But after a couple of minutes into the warm-up I start to convince myself that this is not the same exercise tape Chris did. It couldn't be. I don't remember this long of a warm up. Then the switch kicks came... okay, these are kind of hard...then power jumps.... ouch...suicide jumps...Please forgive me Chris...Low plank obliques... this is the longest minute of my life! Screw good form! 

GOOD. HELL.

I would have ran another marathon before ever doing that again. I've never done a harder workout in my life. Like, about to puke hard. I was dripping with sweat, so I walked upstairs to get ready to shower. As soon as I took my clothes off, I became so dizzy and lightheaded that I decided to just lay down on my towel outside my bedroom (there was no way I was gonna let Chris see me in this condition). So there I was, laying outside my bedroom door in the fetal position, naked. Do you feel awkward reading that? Oh good, me neither.  After about 15 minutes, I finally admitted defeat and literally crawled back to my bed. I couldn't stand up for more than 10 seconds without becoming nauseous. 

Chris was able to nurse me back to health (only after several comments/giggles about how he was right) with some juice. I ended up being late to class that day, and also had to teach myself a new way to walk, since I was so sore. 

Moral of the story: Making fun of your husband could lead you to laying in the fetal position naked, wondering if that's what death feels like--karma is real.

Insanity: 1 Shayli: 0

my manchild

One of the first things I noticed about Chris when we were dating was how good he was with kids. Amazing, actually. Like, so amazing that all my nieces and nephews liked him better than me after only one day of knowing him + causing me to question my child-handling skills (back when I assumed that I had those special skills). But now, I understand why he is so great with kids--he's one himself.

Yes. A taller, hairier, slightly more inappropriate, 25-year-old version of a kid. A manchild, if you will.

His manchild-like behavior includes:

+ Taking more than one mint at Cafe Rio. And by more than one, I mean like 2 handfuls more. Do the outraged stares from Cafe Rio employees and fellow customers get to Chris? Of course not! Manchildren are fearless. Fearless of embarrasing their wives, that is.

+ Teasing me. Just because it's something to do. I pray that our future children do not pick up on this trait of Chris', or Chris just might become the favorite parent. Teasing includes tickling, wrestling, poking, 

+ Needing his juice! Chris will not have any other form of beverage with his breakfast. In all of my 9 months of marriage with him, I have yet to see him drink anything other than Tang, or Crystal Light with his breakfast. I'm not complaining though. I'm all in favor for slapping those extra cals on at breakfast!

+ His "I need a back scratch" routine. This routine can occur anywhere from 2-6 times a day. The routine? 1.give a side glance 2. hunch back over 3. shoulder shimmy. Sometimes, he'll even throw in what I can only assume is supposed to sound like whining puppy noises, but hey, it works.

+ Getting a free pack of smarties from the treasure chest at the grocery store. Every.time. Sometimes when I go to the store by myself I'll even grab one for him just so I can see his face light up when I give it to him.

+ Most recently, buying a kite. Not just any kite, but a Power Ranger kite! I never knew a kite could make someone so giddy. The best part? He even bought it with some of his "allowance."

When I watched Chris fly the kite with our nephew yesterday, I realized that even though I sometimes complain about Chris acting childish, those behaviors are also the very things I love about him. He has all the best qualities that a child has--funny, adventurous, silly, enjoys the little things, care-free, can get along with anyone, etc. Whereas I am like a child in the worst ways, like throwing a fit if I'm not fed, cranky if you wake me up, and pouting if I don't get my way (other than that, I promise I'm a pleasant person to be around). 

I guess what I'm trying to say is....

The next time Chris takes handfuls of Cafe Rio mints, I'll be a little slower to shake my head/roll my eyes ;)